empirical shadows and beautiful light

i sense
tragedy

in my soul i know,
i know we were meant to be and yet
i'm so damn vacant and oblivious that
you would have never accepted it
(at least not for long)

time seems to drift away;
it's no longer of any concern,
why won't this leave me be...
leave
me
be
and
let me sit here,
so lonely and oh, so much further
from this world
than i have ever been before,
thinking only of you

you must have thought the worse
for my abandonment,
for my fallible nature and
for my ignorance;
i wonder if you can hear me
whisper
how so sorry i am

how could i have been so
uncaring in that last moment?
God, i'm stupid.

i'm stupid because
you were more of a gift to me
than i knew
and now i'm left wondering:
'do you echo my sentiments?'

as i think more, and more, and more;
deeper and deeper,
i wish so much
that i could utter to you,
through these tears,
how truly 'i still love you'
and how...

i will
till hell freezes over
and you're reawakened
'my eternal breath of heaven.'

 

Please tell me will you help me
To relieve my love and pain
For every ghostly image
Wishing to see me die in vain

For every wrong I've done
I'll reap what I have sown
Then pray to the wisdom above
To greet me when I go

So bless my words engraved
In the minds of those that read
My book of poetry within
Every thought that I have shed

Pushing me to carry on
Through the gift that God had chose
To give to me so selfless
Until my book does close

And by each step I've taken
Please promise me tonight
That I'll never be forgotten
At the end beyond this life

And when heaven will smile down
To receive me in embrace
This is what I'll leave for you
The gift that God had gave